Lumpectomy, Doggy Style

Cone Head

Jed is lying in his bed, fully dressed.  Jed, being a basset hound, doesn’t normally wear clothes, but this morning he is wearing a green crew neck T-shirt, and plaid boxer shorts. The shorts are too big, so I made him a belt out of 3” green paper tape. As far as dog outfits go – this one is smashing. 


Yesterday Jed had several lumps (benign cysts) removed, as well as a complete dental cleaning. When we picked him up at the vet, he had four large shaved patches, with incisions held together by garish staples. Wobbling on his stubby legs, he looks like a hairy horizontal Frankenstein. 

Guarding the troops. Avec vin.

Tenderly, we loaded Jed on a pillow, and raised him into the back of the jeep. I crawled in with him so that I could wrap my arms around his body and keep him still. Jim, who was driving, looked at us curled up in his rear view mirror. I knew what he was thinking.  On a warm sunny day ten weeks ago, he’d picked up another loved one who was freshly de-lumped, and wobbly. For the second time he’d navigated his truck gently over potholes and speed bumps, determined to get his precious cargo home in one piece.

Later we put a thousand pillows on the floor surrounding the dog bed, and curled up in the style of a 1960’s hippy commune, minus the Mary Jane. Last night we were a fragile lot, with our combined total of six incisions, though the expectation is that we’ll both heal wholly, and completely.


Meanwhile, the focus is on the dog recovery and since I can stay home, I’m fully committed to Jed. He’s been given his medications (I don’t take anything this week) had some cottage cheese (me too), and gone back to sleep. I am dressed in sporty loungewear (blue) as is he (green). The only real difference (besides the length of our pants) is that Jed’s entirely hairy while I’m almost entirely hairless, and Jim is somewhere in between.

Me, post surgery. Jed, pre-surgery